was going through the classified out of boredom yesterday.. finding what kind of jobs i can get with a business administration diploma.. and then, all i found was executive assistant - helping in compilations of sales reports, maintenance and stuff like that.. and all the job required 2 years of relevant working experience.. its so stupid.. how do people have 2 years of working experience when they just graduate?? funny requirement.. and omg.. the job sounds so boring.. super super de sian.. thats not my purpose of studying business admin man.. but, i also don't know my reason of studying business admin.. maybe it was because i wanted to open a shop myself.. but how can i open without working first?? haiz.. also needed the money from work to enter university..
should have studied more for O levels and get into some tourism related courses.. or even something to do with the media.. since i like to watch television programmes so much.. it might even be more interesting to be a helper in a tv studio.. of course i'm talking about working in a taiwan tv studio.. aha.. okay.. these are all illusions from watching too much television programmes..
but i've really thought of living in taiwan.. it would be a great place to live in.. can watch endless of shows, have so much to eat and so many free concerts.. but i just can't stand their political environment.. it seems super messy when compared to singapore.. those ministers can just fight in parliment while debating over issues.. super kua zhang one.. i'm hallucinating again.. aha..
suan le.. since i'm already into the 2nd year of this course, i'll just do my best.. there's no point regretting at this moment of time.. the milk was already spilt..
and i'm alone at home now.. what a peaceful saturday.. tomorrow going to 扫墓.. think its a day earlier.. it's good in this way too.. leaving at only 8am.. this is so much earlier compared to 3am for previous years.. wahaha..
doing these stupid quizzes all because of sheena.. and sheena did all these because of lay ting.. so it's all lay's fault.. ahah.. the handwriting one is damn true.. for me at least.. haha..
♥blurzgal♥3:46 AM
Thursday, March 20, 2008
a series of unfortunate happenings recently.. i will only mention about what happened to me..
but first i need to provide some background information.. i'm those type of person who cries easily.. even the slightest thing can make me cry.. (okay.. think those who are close to me will know..)
so it was the wee hours of 20th of march, wednesday.. was telling sheena that i don't wish to go for work.. cuz it was only me and wei keong reporting for work.. jia ying and myrin were having forced leave as iras was simply overstaffed.. aha.. but i still psycho myself to report for work as i really wish to perservere on something..
and so i slept at 2,3 plus and then woke up at 6.30am.. and as usual, i was half an hour early for work.. i was a bit nervous, just like the first day of work.. cuz the people i was cooked with (jia ying and myrin) wasn't around.. but i told myself at least i appeared for work..
for the first hour or so, i did simple stuff.. but after the first hour, i was to do the job of rovering people.. even though the job was managable in the morning, but my mind was drifting away.. i was really very very moody.. already on the verge of crying.. but i told myself i was working and stopped the tears from coming out.. i asked people for help at the slightest matter.. i wasn't very confident of the decisions i've made.. and i was thinking to myself, "maybe it's the time of the month.." cuz there will be some days of the month where i will just be moody for no reason.. (should be able to tell what am i refering to.. its quite obvious already.. aha..)
and then, the big thing happened.. asked taxpayer A to fill up a form.. and he questioned me in a very very loud voice," why am i supposed to fill up this form?? can't u just fill it up for me??" "but i still need your particulars.." "what for you need my particulars??"
at this moment, taxpayer B asked me questions regarding some issues i've told him earlier on.. of course, i answered his questions.. didn't think of the first-come-first basis principle.. it was a normal reaction to answer when questioned.. and then taxpayer A was unhappy.. he retorted in his loud voice, " attend to my matter first before attending to others!!#$@!$@#%"
and then taxpayer B was unhappy.. and then they started to quarrel over who asked me first.. i was right in the middle of them.. at that moment i was thinking of who did i attended first.. i just can't remember.. so i just answered taxpayer B's queries and ignored taxpayer A's complaints to make taxpayer B go away to stop this heated argument..
after taxpayer B left, taxpayer A was still whining.. and insisted on not filling up his particulars.. he started to scold the fact that i was only a student and still a trainee at that time.. and then daniel (not really sure whether that's his name) came to talk to him.. he still insisted that he don't want to fill up the forms.. so daniel said something back to him.. he damn zai lah.. dare to say such stuff.. (don't want to mention what he said to protect his identity.. aha..)
and then all this while i can already feel the tears forcing their way out.. "control!! i must control!!"
taxpayer A finally left.. then daniel said in a stern voice," you must not be afraid of them.. if not they will just eat you up.." he said.. and then my tears just swell up.. through my blurred vision, i could see that he was a bit shocked.. kept asking me whether i'm okay.. of course i'm not.. then i 哽咽地 say," sorry.. i need to go to the toilet." my tears was bursting out already.. everyone i walked past just started at me.. (it's exactly the same as monday when i rushed to the toilet with a bleeding nose)
spent 10 minutes or so in the toilet.. couldn't stop crying man.. kept thinking of how useless i was.. after i made the tears to stop flowing out, i forced a vague smile on my face and stepped out of the toilet cubicle.. super paiseh.. i was then told it was time for my lunch..
lunch time with wei keong was a bit on the quiet side.. had to rack my brains for topics.. aha..
after lunch, daniel came up to me and said sorry that he was sorry for being so harsh.. but then it wasn't his fault at all.. i asked him to 不要再説了.. cuz once he mention the incident, the tears jiu feel like falling..
work after lunch was even worse.. i felt like a protected animal.. everyone was like so afraid of me crying again.. kept telling me that some taxpayers are like that.. of course i knew that they had kind intentions.. but then at the mention of it, i really really feel like crying agn..
mad a lot of mistakes.. 1 same tax officer came out thrice to tell my superior that i had made mistakes.. at that time i really felt like crying again.. i felt so useless.. i felt so worthless.. wanted to go off early but it was hard for me to open my mouth..
couldn't stop thinking of everything in the mrt.. and a tear drop just fall.. had to yawn to disguise the tear as a tear of tiredness.. while walking home, it was raining.. just the perfect weather for me.. crying in the rain.. now i finally know what that meant..
while crossing the road, i actually hoped that i would accidentally be knocked by a car or something.. or i walk around the neighbourhood for an hour and maybe will get peunomia or something like that.. of course, i didn't do that.. just had intentions..
cried for an hour at home.. kept thinking of how useless i was.. how worthless i was.. how untalented i was.. from the day i was born, maybe i was destined to excel at nothing.. i was
this is a super long post.. (hope i never say out any confidential information..) also, this is a post after i've calmed down.. at some parts of this post, flashblacks appeared in my mind and the tears just fall.. so i really was destined to be useless and crying for everything..
♥blurzgal♥11:25 PM
Sunday, March 16, 2008
oh yeah.. resuming work tomorrow.. actually i feel like staying and rotting at home.. but because of $$, i have to return there.. luckily the people there are all so kind.. haha..
and a lot of pimples started to appear on my forehead.. really a lot man.. hope they will disappear soon.. i don't really get along well with them..
must sleep soon.. don't wanna be late for work.. (actually i'm always 20 minutes early for work.. wahaha..)
♥blurzgal♥11:56 PM
saw jiaying's post.. so i'll try to blog in chinese too.. wahaha..
再过几个月, 我就18岁了.
18岁. 说大不大. 说小也不怎么小.
假如我活在古代, 我可能早已结婚生子了. 就算是现在, 也早已谈过恋爱了吧.
可是我却什么也没有. 最接近 "恋爱" 这两个字也不过就只是沉浸在偶像剧的情节里罢了.
很可悲吧. 就算是那么一丁点的暧昧也没有.
说实话, 我真得很怕会孤独一辈子. 像我这样的人也会有人爱吗?
事实胜于雄辩. 就是不会有.
看了一个节目. 里面有一位艺人叫大家要勇敢说出爱. 说得容易. 做起来还真是难.
问我为什么?
当然是因为害怕.
害怕它的准备功夫. 害怕它的过程. 更害怕它的后果.
勇敢告白的后果? 可能我们就变很尴尬. 可能我们就开始躲来躲去. 可能我们连朋友都做不成了.
所以我想我这辈子都不会勇敢地先说出那三个字.
但我真的渴望爱情.
渴望有人会对我说出那神圣的三个字.
渴望有一个人能让我这杯淡而无味的白开水增加一点味道.
有人说爱情是酸的.
有人说爱情是甜的.
有人说爱情是苦的.
有人说爱情是辣的.
但对于我来说, 爱情是淡的...
♥blurzgal♥3:37 AM
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
oh yeah.. so it was the first day of work today.. seriously, i'm overloaded.. plus the fact that i only slept like 3 hours yesterday.. from 12.30am to 3.30am.. suddenly woke up and couldn't sleep after that..
and although today was supposed to be training, i still find it quite tedious.. super super super a lot and a lot of information.. hope i will perservere on and not quit halfway.. hope..
AND I REALLY DO HATE MAKING DECISIONS!! why let me decide and think of all these again and again, year after year?? doing the same processes each important day.. can i just take a break and treat nothing happen?? haiz.. i think it has became a habit of mine.. but i really do hate it.. for the past few months, i have been doing less of these.. i think.. so it isn't me all the time.. there are still a few as irritated as me..
okae.. enough of all these disheartening talk.. tomorrow will be a new day and i need to read more information about my work now.. don't want to be scolded on the second day of work..
♥blurzgal♥11:24 PM
Monday, March 10, 2008
Hihi Byebye 完整版MV
this mv damn cute can.. haha.. actually she really can sing.. but then don't know why the record company always market her as someone acting cute.. in all her albums, only the 主打 is act cute.. the rest of her album's songs are really quite nice.. and so i'm thinking of buying her album..but then don't know whether i wana buy her jing xuan ji or her 飘飘 album.. or i just save my moneyand don't buy.. haha..
omg!! that stupid ah pek made me check the SAS to understand what modules will i be learning.. and i really got frightened by it man..
2A Core
Marketing Research
Quantitative Analysis
Selling & Sales Management
Understanding Cross Cultural Diversity
Financial & Management Accounting
Report Writing And Presentation Skills
2B Core
Financial Management
Consumer Behaviour
Electronic Commerce Management
Human Resource Management
Principles of Supply Chain Management
Business Law
3A Core
Investment Analysis & Finance
Services Marketing
Marketing Communications
Global Business environment
Business Development
3B Core
Business To Business Marketing
Marketing Management And Information Technology
Law And Ethics Relating To Retail And Marketing
Business Development
Communication Skills For Business
and there's still ITP.. omg.. don't know how much the modules of human resource management differ from mine.. MYRIN!! if you see this post, can post your modules also?? quite curious man.. haha..
Yup.. and so i'm in DBA/FT/2A/10.. and 11 of DBA 02 are in there.. so half of the new class would be familiar faces.. don't know whether that's a good or bad thing.. aha.. just hope my classmates will all accept me.
starting work tomorrow.. IRAS.. a bit nervous, a bit scared and a bit excited.. finally working at a office after so working at various places.. auntie's gift shop, analysing taxis for LTA, factory work and of course NTUC homemart.. all these don't really need much of a brain.. so hope i am ready for tomorrow's challenge.. haha..
加油!!
♥blurzgal♥8:44 PM
Saturday, March 8, 2008
命中注定我愛妳preview
think this show would be a hit once it's released.. aha..
haiz.. been crying quite a lot these few days.. not because i'm sad or what.. but because of the shows and movies i had been watching..
the first was cj7.. finally watched it on friday with sheena, jackie and lay ting.. finally.. the movie was damn touching at the end lah.. especially for the part when 七仔 saved 周星馳's life and made it's own battery flat as a result.. my tears just burst out from my eyes for that part..
next was Death Note Spin Off - L Change The World.. watched it yesterday with hui ling, qi xia, eugene and wei zhi.. and the ending also super touching.. there was one scene which made the tears already swelled up in my eyes to fall.. and another which made tears blast out of my eyes..(haha.. a bit kua zhang) but i sort of forgot which scenes.. i could only remembered i was crying like mad for the last 20 minutes or so.. keep using my jacket to wipe my tears.. oh yah.. speaking of jacket..
whle watching this movie, there was also the preview of 第一誡.. and i was clever enough to use it as a screen shield for me.. wahaha.. (so, don't laugh at me anymore le carrie..) manage to catch a few glimpse of the movie.. quite curious also lah.. aha.. but i concentrated on the actors and not other things.. maybe i'll watch the movie too..
and L was super super cute!! it's a must-watch man!!
and ytd, we celebrated my grandmother's birthday.. the one living with me.. it was quite a pathetic one.. about 20 people went to the coffee shop to eat zhi char only.. and the reason was that my first uncle is now in hospital again.. his already injured leg got infected.. didn't know the exact details of his condition.. cuz whenever i probe my father with this question, he just say quite serious only.. but from what i hear, my auntie told me that the bone of his leg could already be seen.. when i visitied him when he was admitted to hospital for the first time, the muscles could be seen.. and now, it was the bone.. and of course, the more i think, the more i cry.. although i'm not really that cooked with him, but he's still my uncle after all.. hope he recovers soon..
so maybe it's a good thing my grandmother have not yet seen my uncle.. she only knows he's in hospital.. our family didn't want to worry her.. cuz there was once whereby my 4th uncle fainted while working.. and then my 4th auntie called my house to tell me to inform my parents.. but they weren't in.. so she told me to inform my grandmother.. contacted my mother at first instance.. but she didn't pick up her phone.. (totally forgot to call my father) so i informed my grandmother.. she was damn worried lah.. started calling everyone cuz she don't know the details.. and in the end, i was reprimanded for not telling my aunties first.. so, i finally know why not to let my grandmother know..
to say the truth.. this year's celebration was quite pathetic.. compared to previous years, we always planned a month or so before hand.. where to celebrate.. where to find 7 tables to compromise all of our family.. and also the cake.. for the past 3 years, 26 grandchildren chipped in to buy the birthday cake.. and the cousins living in sembawang would be the ones choosing the design.. (only 4 girls attended to this matter.. the others couldn't be bothered.. aha) it was a real headache man.. went to so many cake stores.. and having to collect $$ from 26 people when they appear for the celebration wasn't a mean feat.. the mouth just couldn't open.. so i'm quite pleased to find out i nonid to do all this again for this year..
that's not all for my teary session..
and then, it was the special reports of the death of 沈殿霞 on channel 54's primetime news..it lasted for an hour.. 9pm to 10pm.. and i think i've cried for 45 minutes after minus-ing the commercials.. i just can't stand people crying.. especially when the screen shows her daughter's crying face.. the speech by 曾志偉 was also a tears-blaster..
decided to change my newly changed blog song 眼淚 to 明星.. the favourite song by 沈殿霞.. also wish my uncle's leg would recover soon!!
♥blurzgal♥6:40 PM
Welcome!
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It's Me
Gal
Slacker
Slacked from 28.10.1990
Slacked for 17++ years
Scorpio
Singapore Polytechnic
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slim =)
5566 opening concert in sg
and hopefully, a dream of what i want to be..
